SHART ATTACK

From: Mike M. Shart, VC, Lune Valley Enterprise University (LuVE-U)
To: All staff
Cc: Hewlett Venklinne, Head Coordinator: Credence Coordination
Subject: Our Latest Accolade

Dear all,

Jubilations aside, allow me to express my jubilation at our jubilation!

You won’t have failed to notice that LuVE-U was mentioned in the press this week. But this was no ordinary press mention – we have been named ‘Higher Education Provider of the Year’ by none other than the Racing Post! Now, some of you may be asking why a publication that deals solely with horse racing would dedicate a front page to exulting us as its designated Higher Education Provider of the year. Indeed, I asked myself the very same question, but Hewlett assures me that this only goes to show how deeply we have penetrated the public psyche. That LuVE-U could possibly catch the attention of a publication so distracted by matters other than HE is a boon, I am told.

Hewlett also tells me, on an entirely unrelated note, that the hot tip for this Sunday’s race is ‘Buffalo Catscan’, and that a tenner on the nose for Buffalo Catscan to win wouldn’t go amiss. Hewlett also tells me that by way of gratitude, in keeping with the highest academic tradition, we should all unite in purchasing a copy of the Racing Post from our nearest newsagent to read precisely what the publication has said about us – some sort of copyright restriction prevents me from sharing the related text in full, apparently.

So yes. Let’s all buy the Racing Post to see what they said about us. And, by way of continued gratitude, let all 20,000 of us take an interest in the racing and buy the Racing Post every day, for all the Racing, Cards, and Results. Explore our Horse and Jockey Profiles, only in the Racing Post.

All the best,
MMS.

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