No one talks about Occam’s other idea,
when his razor didn’t cut deep enough,
his hammer smashed down.
‘Of an event occurring, it is most likely that the simplest one is the correct one’
‘Of an inevitability occurring, the one that hurts the most is the correct one’
When Occam’s hammer falls,
it’s not a matter of when or where it lands,
it’s simply a matter of how hard it hits,
and if this time you choose to scream.
Just got a letter from disability insurance: Denied. I’m not disabled enough to get anything. After months of trying to convince them.
How do you prove you can’t work?
I cannot sit up, stand, or walk hardly at all. There is no job I can do while laying down, without having to make phone calls.
Just laying here, my back aches. But it’s the most comfortable position I can find. (It hurts my hips but those aren’t important.)
If I dared to sit up, my lower and upper back would scream in agony. It would not end until I laid back down.
I couldn’t keep working; had to move back in with my toxic parents. I have no money, no freedom, and no chance. I have no future. And that terrifies me.
I’m a survivor. The world wants me dead. It’s only a matter of time.
I get back upI keep stumbling
I keep falling
I keep breaking
I struggle to get back up
I listen…I feel pain
I listen….I lose sight
I lose control
I lose meI ask myself
Want me to be?
Need me to be?
Make me to be?
I define me
I defy being defined by illness
I the author
I the architect
I the enforcer of my life journey
I find me again
I see me now
Do you see me?
His hand closed up over the stretch of five years, and stayed like that till he passed. First the pinkie, as if winched towards the palm by an invisible string, and then the ring finger went, till his hand was frozen stiff like a claw. It was like it had slowly snapped shut, sixty years late for the butterflies we’d chased in Parson’s field. It was no worry to him, he chuckled, his pipe still fit between his fingers.