SHART ATTACK

FROM: Enoch Benito McAdolf, President, LuVE-U White Christian Preservation Society

TO: Jacob Woolly, President, LuVE-U Student Experience Co-ordination Unit

Dear Jacob,

I would like to thank you for disregarding the absurd notion that I am trying to set up some kind of Nazi society. Advocating for the preservation of a white, Christian Europe is nothing like Nazism because Hitler was an atheist, and I am glad that the officers accepted our reasoning so readily at our last meeting.

As per your request, here is the annual budget for our proposed student society. I trust that your societies committee will have no issues with this.

White cloth and scissors, £87

Wooden stakes, £30

Nails, £60

Hydrogen peroxide solution, £40

1 litre industrial fertiliser x 6, £22.85

10 kilos pig carcasses, £1.46 per kilo

1 kilo vaseline, £10

Best,

EMcA

***

FROM: Jacob Woolly, President, LuVE-U Student Experience Co-ordination Unit

TO: Enoch Benito McAdolf, President, LuVE-U White Christian Preservation Society

CC: Mike M. Shart, VC, Lune Valley Enterprise University (LuVE-U)

Hi Enoch,

Nothing amiss here as far as I can see mate. Have copied in the VC as the uni’s been wanting to monitor the group for some reason. I would send this back to the societies committee but they keep going on at me.

Jacob.

***

FROM: Mike M. Shart, VC, Lune Valley Enterprise University (LuVE-U)

TO: Jacob Woolly, President, LuVE-U Student Experience Co-ordination Unit

CC: Hewlett Venkklinne, Head of Positive Institutional Perception Synergy

Hi Jacob. Not had chance to look over what this white christian preservation society entails, but Hewlett tells me that the movement is deeply rooted in British history – something about national socialism? Should keep the unions happy. Go right ahead, sounds good.

Mike.

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